Why are you surprised?

A two hundred pound Jack

flying a bus through the sky

A tiny woman 

driving a mammoth truck.

A simple frown destroying the day

A gentle kiss to launch
an emotional storm

or to start a fierce war.

A simple set of thoughts

able to describe relativity

A single invisible neutron

to destroy Nagasaki.

One little spark on a stick

to blow up a mountain

A single discouraging word

to destroy an entire career.

Used to be said

All good things are free in life

But then came taxes on water

On air and open sky.

Good things are still free

You just have to dig deeper

Those things invisible

Reside within you to share.

There is no charge for a loving smile

A generous hug

Or unplanned casual touch

Invisible, free and delightful.

Meek shall inherit the earth

Not a person who can't speak

Or will not speak

But those who may not speak.

They are tirelessly working 

To make it better

To fix all wrongs

But remain invisible.

They are  invisible emotions

That well up from inside

Without a promise of reward

even against your wishes.

But why are you surprised?

The power of creation 

Started with a Big Bang

Most likely from an invisible nothing.

Can it get any smaller?

A Perception of Reality

A perception of reality

This moment is real but no different than any other moment including the one when this sentient being appeared in a body at a similar moment. In this moment as in any other moment there is a multidimensional  presence. This presence is perceived by itself in a conscious way by sentient beings and unconsciously by others. This difference in perception which has nothing to do with the presence creates a duality we call the world.

The bodies of sentient beings are endowed with certain senses (hence the word sentient) capable of detecting several but not all dimensions of this presence, such as touch, taste, smell, hearing and thought. These five senses do not have a physical attribute. They just sense and report each moment like this moment. The body has an extra sensor called vision. At the moment when vision is activated , physical attributes appear and are superimposed on the sensory reports. This creates the physical universe we perceive every moment.

At another moment the reports of these six senses are different, we call it change. To account for these changes, the mind of thoughts creates a story of time, past, present and future.

It is possible to perceive reality by undoing this story usually through shutting down the sensors one by one starting with vision which takes away the physical attribute leaving only memory which also fades with time and all that is left is this moment with sensory reports.

The Search

The search for truth is over when in spite of years of looking you can't find anything and you finally give up. There are many names for this event, all false.

But can you stop looking even if the most respected or loved person told you so?

Nope, this has to be realized.

Nothing is Really Here

Close your eyes and see

Get it?

Yes, then you can actually see 

the truth 

that nothing is really here. 

Even the eyes are not here 

nor the darkness called nothing. 

These words aren't here

Not the reader, nor the writer.

One telling the truth isn't here

Truth isn't here

Lies aren't here.

The universe isn't here

Here is not here

There is not here

Nothing.

Go back 

to the first photon.

Past the stars

Past the galaxies

Beyond the universe.

Look back

What do you see?

Nothing?

That's all there is.

Worse still

The looker isn't there.

That's why I say

The dead end up here.

STYTS: Stop Taking Yourself Too Seriously

You've heard the advice: Stop Taking Yourself Too Seriously! 

Enjoy life, eat, drink and be merry. 

But if you can't find happiness,  ask who can't find happiness, if the one who can't find happiness was absent, would there be unhappiness?

Hundreds of spiritual masters, priests, pundits and new age gurus are misleading seekers by simply renaming self with consciousness, awareness, observer and yes, Jesus and God. It kept tripping me up for decades. Liberationunleashed.com finally gave me a simple option. Why not start with the simplest option? Look and see what you can tangibly find. If you can't find anything, may be there is nothing to find. No self, no observer, no awareness, no God just as there is no Santa, no unicorn no superman. It was too simple but everythime I checked I found it to be true. 

Now, I can't promise that like me you wouldn't hold a secret desire and admiration for an all pervasive nothingness which some may call God but you will find as I have that starting from ground zero, literally believe in nothing, is a good place to hang your hat and carry on life. One beautiful outcome of this is that suffering becomes just like taking a crap, a momentary discomfort and sometimes a great relief.

Just to remind you of the techniques, close your eyes and do the touch expereiment and see that there are no finger tips, no skins, no hair and no self and no observer. All just labels mind loves, nay needs to attach to things to function. Once you see that there is no one, it will try to label it to awareness like some other guru is talking about. But that too is bullshit.

Someone Never Suffers

Look inside, outside, around and in imagination. Look everywhere and  find moments when all is serene within you, around you before you and after you. Try meditating, sleeping, exercising, loving or even holding your breath. Shiva taught this technique eons ago. Idea he had which is evergreen is that once you have tasted this moment often when there is no suffering, you will realize that all suffering is transient. Since something that can disappear for a moment, can disappear forever. If you know the magician's card trick, can he really pull that ace out of the pack again and wow you?

There is someone that never suffers. Why can't that be you and forever?

Reality

Not much is real, at least that can be reported by the feeble instrument called body and mind.

Reality is a word which by definition means, that which is not fake or unreal. 

As soon as you move, even a thought, the illusion begins. So the only way to even barely sense reality is to be very still, not move. And then you get a glimpse of the peace and joy that can be felt, even though it is second hand. 

Prior to memories being recorded right after birth, the only memory you inherited was at a cellular level from million or even billion years of evolution;  some call it incarnation. There are layers of reality that goes on the base of non existence. Nonexistence must be a precursor to existence. Deduction leads us to reality being complete and absolute nothingness.

We could stop right there, since it is an oxymoron to look for nothing. But mind deduces things based on previous arguments, historical events and current sensations. And the mind having tasted the bliss  when things, feelings and thoughts are eliminated or reduced, projects that reality must be nothingness, stillness, quiet and void.

Is there any point in doing this line of intellectual meditation? Absolutely, every other nonsense you think about leads to suffering. This one actually makes you happy. If you can be happy.

How can you be sure you have seen through the illusion of self?

I, me or self is nothing but a thought construct, an illusion or a story made up by the mind spurred by the society and family from an early age. As I have argued in another blog below that it is indeed a hard task to see through this illusion even though it is clearly a requirement for awakening by almost all masters, scriptures; modern or ancient.

And there are techniques galore. Every one has new twist on it. Our own method at liberation unleashed is a focus on direct experience. Hindus will have you chant Sanskrit slokas and conduct elaborate rituals, Buddhists meditate for weeks on end. Christians require follow the one and only Jesus and Muslims ask to surrender to Allah. Every one, bar none wants you to drop this ego or the I, me or self.

I recently revisited some of papaji's videos and loved his prescription; just be quiet. So I did for almost a week. I am cheating a bit by watching the video and writing this blog. But in another clip he says you have to use a thorn to take out a thorn. Any way he inspired me to contemplate on how can you be sure that you have indeed seen through this illusion?

This is a practical question for me and several seekers that I have come across. There seems to be residual doubt left in many minds that may be we haven't looked hard enough or we may find this I somewhere. It doesn't help that there is an entire group of teachers who float terms like consciousness, awareness, soul and the awakened one. These to me are just promoting the self out of its current existence into a grander one. Still an illusion, for if there is something beyond, mind will never get it and that means we can't discuss it.

So how do you know that you don't exist? The answer lies in suffering. Suffering is the hallmark of self. No self, no suffering. Pain yes, sensations yes but suffering no. Once the illusion of self has been uncovered, suffering should cease. Thoughts of fear, anger, hate and love will still happen but none of them will cause suffering. Unfortunately for most this is not an overnight or instantaneous shift. It takes time even after the event of disrobing the I. But there is a clear shift in the severity of suffering. So, before if you ruminated over the threat of losing a job for days and weeks, now that may only last a few hours.

Life and living is easier since without the debilitating effect of suffering, you can now handle the pain and fear in a proactive manner. You can do something about an oncoming disaster rather than be frozen into inaction. That is a good thing.

Can you ever be happy?

To what end do you toil? Ask anyone and the answer is most likely to be "I want to be happy ". Even the saints and good Samaritans do what they do to be happy. Meditators meditate, new age people read tarot cards, do reiki, take deeksha, go to satsang, and do yoga; all intended to make them happy. Is that true for you too?

Here is my problem. Unless you know what you are and unless you can define happiness, can "you" really be "happy" ? 

Oh yes, you could get that exciting feeling in your spine or that blissful state with tears of love running down your cheeks. Is that it? You are looking for some euphoria  like in an orgasm? So it is a body thing, is it? Try this, go to a scary movie. Curious you will get a similar wave of excitement in your body as you would in a feel good movie. The body doesn't know where you get it the chemical fix, as long as you get it.

Or, may be you are a mind person, looking for cerebral happiness like the one you get when you win a lottery, a game, a fight or discover the cure for cancer. Or is it? How would your million dollar win feel if every one else won $2 million? And what if the day they gave you Nobel  prize for curing cancer, someone found an African plant that proved be 100% effective in wiping out cancer? Yes, if a process could guarantee no more suffering like meditation, mind will be truly happy. No need for a million bucks or the recognition you seem to seek.

That is still only partial solution to my dilemma. This happiness you seek seems to apply only to the body and mind. But are you the body and mind? If you are not the body and mind but something beyond, or worse still nonexistent, how could you ever be happy?

May be that's why Krishna said in the geeta, karmanyeva adhikarashte ma faleshu kadachina... " you only have the rights to act none for the results". He knew it won't make you happy anyway, so why bother. Actions on the other hand may make your body sing and mind suffer less. That's about the best you can hope for if happiness is what you seek.

So, can you ever be happy? Unfortunately, no!  The body and mind could feel  bliss and euphoria but you my dear just don't exist. 

Mindfulness Misunderstood

Once during a Buddhism meditation practice, we did this raisin eating exercise. If you haven't done    the experiment, it is simply taking a very long time to touch, feel, taste and finally eat a raisin in five may be even ten minutes. Some may call it mindfulness but I think this works well only if you make your other senses come to life and engaged. It works well if you cajole your mind into stopping its normal function of thinking and get our other organs which are normally hijacked by the mind, to do what they do best. Feel!

So to me, mindfulness really means paying attention; eyefulness, nosefulness, tastiness, touchyfeelyness and simply loveliness.

The confusion arises due to the common understanding of mindlessness, when one goes about living like a mindless zombie. So naturally we assume that being mindful is the opposite of that. It is the process of thinking that confuses the issue. Being mindless means living without paying attention not necessarily without thought.

"I,Me, Self" was born out of love

Not I, the body, I the mind or I the soul but I the label was also born in love.  This body at the age of nine months and before survived due to just one reason, love. Had it not been the love from my parents, "I" would just be a lost entity. They offered "Me" the identity as an I with a name, a home, a country, a religion and a whole bunch of attributes. Nothing other than love could have such an immense impact on the psyche of the body and mind to imbue an unshakable belief that "I" actually exists.

To undo this, to realize that there is no I, me or self, unfortunately I has to discount the most sacred thing in its life and being and that is the love of the creator, the creator of this I.

Truth is born out of disloyalty to the love that created you. What a bummer!

Love takes on this grandiose conceptual status but it starts with the body and touch which nature has designed for you to feel immediate bliss. It is the most powerful drug for all life and it is wildly addictive. It is mind bending and intoxicating and it is operating on you 24/7. Look within and find that ALL you do is for this concept created by the blissful touch started right at the beginning when your senses started to report to your brain and to form neural circuits.

But to know this truth that "you" are just a mis-perception, an illusion you have no choice but to undo this love and discover that the drive within you to seek this bliss through this love is also an illusion. As long as you keep seeking it in this way, you will be attached to the this dual world and not be free.

Mind has created elaborate schemes to keep tying you into this duality as a force of habit, as a way to keep getting this fix. Transcend this habit and find that it isn't the touch from another that creates bliss but the body itself is bliss available to you 24/7 when you know how.

Find out how?

Why Me?

Biological and mechanical sensors have limited range. So while body and mind can quickly notice an aching back, I can't sense the supernovae light years away. This gets more complicated as mind and thoughts interpret the pain as belonging to it because of the proximity. Thus the chain of identification begins eventually leading to this clumsy world of fear and joy.

Mind does have the ability to parse through the signals and opt to limit itself to this puny self or extend its reaches to totality. Takes constant vigil known as meditation.

All there is, is an integral of all changes in the limits of 0 and infinity. Me is just a very tiny part of the resulting unity and loves the comfort and limits of its existence. That's why.

TOTAL RECALL

Every thing you know or can know is or is based on memory. Everything! So, can you trust your memory to tell you the truth?

A seeker said in passing that the reason we do not recall much of our first three years of life is because our memory is not fully developed. Think of a really bad experience from the past. Death of a parent or a loved one for instance. That was a body of flesh and bones that was labelled by your mind as a dad or a spouse. When he or she left for a few days, your mind labelled it brief absence. But now it is labeling it a permanent absence. All labels! In reality everything you felt in his or her presence or you feel now is based on memories. Your sadness is based on a memory of not having the interaction then or now.

Your fear of losing a job not having money or a catastrophe in the future is based on a memory of similar event or memory of something you read, saw or imagined. How many times have things not been what you anticipated them to be?

If you were able to recall all your life events even from early years, they would still be memories. All your suffering is based on memories haunting you. All your happiness is also based on  memories.

Reality beyond memories is not fathomable by a mind which is nothing but a collection of memories.

Left Handed Blessing

This phrase is ascribed to Buddha. Without some suffering, pain or calamity mind is unlikely to even entertain the notion that its construct called I, me or self is just an illusionary thought, idea, notion or concept. It would be hard for a seemingly rich in wealth, health and love body mind to even think that  it is not in control, the doer or a person. Thereby the unit sets it up for an eventual disenchantment and persistent ignorance.

Mind is designed to solve problems not be critical of its seemingly happy state. Rejoice in suffering for it is your ticket to freedom, it is a left handed blessing.

GOD

To convince body and mind that the God concept is nothing but an idea is hard. Scientists have shown that even a small but striking event changes the neurological make up of your brain and I postulate that such a memory somehow gets encoded in your genetic make up. If we can carry simple skills like breathing and love for millions of years, it is quite likely that faith in a superpower is hard wired. Simple things like alcoholism, experts say, you never get over, it can only be controlled by a constant vigil. Faith in a God and equating it to some thing we actually know or may find someday can only be denied through constant vigil.

Once awakened, you are on a path from which there is no turning back. Many here in our LU group still contemplate that there is some mysterious force behind all of this but that the I, me or self as we know it or can know it, is just false. There is no evidence of such an entity. There is a direct experience of mysterious forces of nature which some in the past have tried to co-opt it as self. That is a discussion for another day, month or eternity. But that's not you as anyone knows it. So, surrender your arms, self and come to the forum of life and join in this mysterious debate if you like.


"The real atheism is the philosophy which talks as if it carried the Absolute in its brief-case, and the piety which has altogether got over its surprise. To find Him quite believable is no longer to believe in Him. For a Whole easily understood and approved, incapable of shocking and overwhelming us, cleaned up or watered down to suit our drawing-room and prayer-meeting daintiness – such a Whole is not even a useful myth. When we are at our best are we not thankful that this glorious and terrible Reality is just what it is? The fact that it is mysterious beyond telling and altogether unlike our design for it – this is surely the very thing that makes it so adorable. In Hell we know and are known only too well, and are all expert theologians and psychologists; but in Heaven we never begin to recover from our astonishment at one another, and therefore boredom is unknown. Knowledge that is only knowledge is the very abyss of ignorance. (Douglas Harding. The Hierarchy of Heaven and Earth.)

LIBERATION

There is an inherent paradox in the question, "Who Am I". As with most things spiritual, the one who asked you to look at this question may have had something very different in his noble mind than what you or I are led to understand not because of our poor intellect but because of the logical mind we possess.

Unwittingly this question implies that there is an I we should be searching. It turns out this is VERY WRONG.

Do yourself a favour and take a look at liberationunleashed.com where hundreds of volunteers are available 24/7 to guide you in asking the right questions.

I did and came up with the answer that first you must establish whether there is an I before you look for it. I know, it is obvious that you are there, right? WRONG! Check it out.

Thought as a Direct Experience : A Discussion

Think of a cup. The thought is perceived in sensation. The image of a cup is not; it is only a picture of a cup in your mind. But the thought is a real thought.

Think of a real cup in your kitchen. The cup in the kitchen is real; the cup in the thought, the picture, is not.

The thought of this cup Points to a real cup in the kitchen, but the cup in the mind is not real.

The Thought is Real; it's Content is not.

For me, there is no difference between the thought and it's contents. They appear as the same item.

 But they are NOT. There is thought, and there is its content. The contents of your thoughts are all different. You have many many thoughts, which you perceive; they are all about something different.  Not the same item at all!

Can we go back to the picture analogy. The picture of a cup is not the cup, similarly thought of a castle is not the castle... is that what you mean? the picture is real but the cup isn’t. The cup is the content of the picture. The image contained in the thought is imaginary, not real. The thought itself is experienced and is real.

Mind labels the picture 'a picture. It has reality as I can touch it. Measure it's dimensions. Get it valued at an art gallery. I can't touch a thought.

We can sell the picture of the cup but not the cup for it isn’t here.

The image in your thought does not have dimensions; it cannot be touched. The thought itself cannot be touched, but it can be perceived, or sensed.

Certainly a thought can be perceived or sensed. Does that make it real?

You are talking of a thought of the picture which has a cup. I meant thought is like a picture which is real. the content of the picture (or thought) is a cup which is not real.

So, direct experience like a kiss or a hug is real but thinking about them is not, although the thought of a hug is very real and can have the similar pleasant experience until the movie is over.

The analogy you offer must surely be incorrect. A picture of a cup can be viewed as two separate items. I know that the cup is not real. But I can see the picture and it is real.

In my mind I know that my imagined cup is not real. However, there is no container. The thought is of the cup. There is nothing real here.

The thought of a hug is real????

Close your eyes and think of a cup. You can experience the image of the cup even though you cannot see it.

You are NOT viewing the image in the mind with the eyes in the head.

Its the thought about a thought that may be tripping you

Perhaps. Could you could tell me the difference between a thought, and the content of a thought?

I am thinking of you right now. This is a real thought. But the content, you, is not here, not real.

How do you know?

I can write it down, I can tell you, I can remember it.

I see the problem; you want to use the five senses to define reality of thought. That can only be done indirectly like if I am angry at you.

If you could read my mind like both of us can touch the cup, then it would be easy for you to verify that my thought is real.

I think it's just a confusion over language used. If you simply mean thoughts are perceived, in the way all other senses operate then sure. I can’t think of any way to directly make you feel my thought but you could feel your own thought so it is a direct experience. Again like memory of a nice hug. It might also be a problem with the word 'real'.

It is deeper than that. In fact all senses eventually get recognised by arousing a feeling within. In that way, thoughts are no different.

Body/mind takes the content of the thought to be real, even though it is not.

"Thought" is a pretty primitive term. "Mental visual image" might be more accurate for this kind of thought. Thoughts come in all shapes, sizes and complexities with mixes of visual, sound and feeling. There is no particular distinction of content from the thought itself, the content IS the thought. However, there are aspects to the thought that can be set aside: location, size etc.

But if the contents themselves, like I, me or self, or even false things like Santa and the unicorn, find no definition by other senses , then the thought may be considered real but not its contents.

Nothing but labels

Does maharaja, my cat, feel sad when he can't get out in snow? Yes but does he label it sad and then spin stories about it until he can no longer function and need Prozac? No. Neither right nor wrong, human brain comes up with labels to function in creation. In fact right down to the strings that apparently constitute it all, everything is a label. Even the so called god particle or Higgs boson critter is also a label attached to something we just don't know what it is. When we don't know what it is that stirs our heart strings and pulls us towards something we call it love. Of course the opposite of that has to exist as hate.

The only unlabeled item, concept or idea is nothing. This one leaves us empty, silent and at peace. Life in reality is all about nothing. Embrace it and all attachment falls into a useless pile of junk.

Bliss, the search for a spiritual orgasm.

I am very tired of me looking for that blissful state many arrived gurus and pretenders talk about. Kundalini masters wax and wane on the drug less highs. I am tired because I want it too, just like the only thing I ever wanted as a teenager was sex.

Then I started questioning how do these experienced masters describe this wow feeling. First of all I do not have any reference of this bliss by Buddha, Christ, Krishna, Nisargdatta or Ramana. Unless you want to reinterpret their words and see what isn't there. I am not being disrespectful to those who report of wild orgy like states, I call the feeling, spiritual  orgasm. But I have only two choices at this point either keep pining for this like a prepubescent boy or try to explain why some get it others do not.

Do you recall any of your childhood ecstasies? Like the first time your bike and you actually stayed up, or the first time your hand brushed against a girl, any body part, or some exotic food you had for the first time; mine was a white chocolate mousse made by a master chef in Bruxelles. I think neuroscientists will tell you that we become an expert by forgetting the novelty of things. That's why driving is nowhere as much fun as it was the first time, in spite of you popping the clutch until dad almost smacked you.

Many describe this spiritual orgasm to be a process of forgetting conditioning and going back to a child like state.  So it's not that you are not getting it. You are having an orgasm all the time, its just that you are paying no attention to it. But just know that it is yet another physical kick you are trying to get and has little to do with you finding god. It's yet another merry go around, be ecstatic, may be a few more times and then it's another experience and then it is over. How do you get close to feeling that first time biking experience? Don't do it for a few years. Getting back on the bike will feel so good.

Do you see now, why sensory deprivation like locking yourself in a cave or abstinence is part of the path? These are all mental gymnastics to make your blissful feeling come up from all the crap experiences and thoughts that clutter your mind. This is why yogis love shavasana; lie completely still after an intense yoga. Or like in one of poems ("don't take that step", check older posts), one move takes you out of heaven into hell. This is why mindfulness, a process of excluding all else but one experience works to bring you back home, back to your child like state. Go for it.

Just Because

Just because there is no me
This body is not so bad
The mind still thinks, works and feeds
The heart still loves, hates and cries.

Just because there is no me
Love is not absent
Your presence is not felt
My cat is not an orphan.

Just because there is no me
Tears don't drop
Emotions haven't dried up
Fear doesn't add spice to living.

Just because there is no me
Life still goes on
Hurt still goes on
Beauty is still felt grand.

I still love you
I still hurt
I still explode with anger
I still lie helpless.

Why, you ask?
Just because.

Awareness is not a noun

I often hear Gurus talk of awareness as a noun. I am awareness, you are awareness, god is awareness, awareness is all there is and so on. I am a little dense and nonexistent. As far as I know there is no me, I cant't find it. So if I am awareness, then awareness is not either. So no god, no me, no you.

What I need is my grade 9 English teacher. She would say, boy, awareness is not a noun. It is a quality. You can have awareness but can't be awareness. Now since I am not therefore something other than I or you has awareness. I and my existence is questionable but the existence of awareness is not. Close your eyes and you are aware of something. Touch something and you are aware.

All sentient beings are aware. In fact if rocks had a mind they will report that they are aware, especially when the water torture that shapes its looks begins. Sodium ions in water are aware of chloride  how else would they find each other to make common salt. And salty air is aware of the car or how else would make that rust bucket happen. May be, just may be awareness is what holds the planet together and the entire constellation circling each other in perpetuity.

Clara on the Universe

To summarise what Clara said, all that we consider as is, was or will be is just a potential universe in the mind of shiva. My interpretation, laws of physics determine the entire outcome of evolution from energy to whatever will come and back. In that one point infinity, there is evolution of mind which ends up understanding some of these things.

.Laws of physics are our attempt to understand nature and the universe as we know it through experience such as thinking, imagining, feeling and touching and hearing. It could be un-quantum but the observer, i.e this body mind is limited and hence the universe, the only one we know is limited. The incomprehensible reality is just incomprehensible. It is not the reality we find by our senses. A quantum theory could be a reflection of this incomprehensible reality but that's all it can be otherwise it wont be incomprehensible. In fact all comprehensible reality includes all but the incomprehensible reality.

Are all outcomes supposed to be quantum? in my estimate of shiva's reality, all outcome are included and predetermined. i haven't done the math but i suspect this is why some come up with these multiverse results. the incomprehensible reality includes all outcomes, the most remote ones as well. only one of those outcomes is this observer hence has such a limited view of the past, present and future on a fabricated axis called time.

Meditation on Reality

I have heard this word and read about this reality for ages. I still don't understand it and probably never will since all my understanding is based on some knowledge acquired from other people, things, books and media. Nothing I am is original. I function by building concepts. So here is an experiment I did and encourage you to do as well to define your own concept of reality. This is inspired by Rupert Spira's works but I am a total fake anyway, everything I am is from someone else including my genes. There is a poem on this in the book, "the dead-end (up) here".

Close your eyes and try to shut everything down. What is really there? Really there? I (an instrument I seem to know) find something that is named touch, something vague named smell, another sensation which is called sound. Even though the eyes are closed, there is a hue of something called light and completely invisible stuff going on called thoughts and imagination. Important to notice that this is all not far into space which you know as body parts and stereo or TV since that is the next part of my experiment. For now, all of this is happening here, right there. That is all you know as reality. If you can stay here and go nowhere, congratulations you have found all you ever will, seek no more, hang up your skates, throw in the towel. You are done! This is reality.

But I know you as I know me. That active invisible thing called thoughts and imaginations has other plans. It will take these nothings you just found and will throw in some magic to build an universe of everything you know. It will start by first building something called you and do it so many millions of times that you will have no choice but to be convinced. Now open your eyes and you will see the wonder that has been created for your ultimate pleasure by this awesome holograph. Enjoy but know that it is all make belief. Some call it projection. It has taken me eight years to understand what they meant  As I said, I am a little dense. But you don't be, try to get it, this is not reality.

For this I feel grateful to the magic but especially Richard Rose who talked about projection, to Nisargdatta who said you are a little light pen which keeps drawing the universe ( mind said what?), and most importantly to Liberation Unleashed and its wonderful generous guides and founders.

CLARA ON UPNISHAD

SUNIL: I have been reading some of Nagarjuna's work on emptiness. I amtrying to answer the question, why is compassion a critical part ofBuddhism and not in the Upanishads? Or am I wrong? I would love yourthoughts on this.

CLARA: I think Vedanta is philosophical and the Upanishads go straight to self-realization.I believe the tradition held that the aspirants ethics was already taken care before they approached the teachings.Buddhism, on the other hand, looks more like a graded method that includes the development of ethics.The Puranas are full of stories of the deities love affairs, or not?What about Rama and Sita? Is that not love?The Upanishads are the final teaching. The former stages are implicit.Many thanks and love, 

SUNIL: Knowing the puranas is one thing and really understanding is another.Same is true of Buddha'a emptiness and his insistence on compassionand wisdom.As for the love affairs in the Puranas like Ram and Sita and Krishnaand Radha had a lot of author's craft in them rather than facts. Whoknows what they actually said, all we know is what Valmiki and Vyassaid in the two epics.Yes, all religion including Buddhism insist on a lot ofpre-conditioning before you deserve to be one with god. The coreupnishads say no such precondition at least according to my reading.They flat out say you are it, just know it, in sixteen different ways.No need for love, sex or rituals. Methods, yes, meditate on OM, payattention, etc. Shiva in Tantra has 108 different ways to achievenirvana. None of them says be a good person and love your neighbour.

Respect and Gratitude to Rev Clara Llum

A very dear friend and teacher Clara Llum (clarallum.org) recently passed away. I had the great fortune to communicate with her often including just a few months ago when she was going under the knife. the only regret she had was that there was still a lot more work to be done. For me she will never be gone. Her words and insistence that I really didn't need to fret much, all will be done. 

I am going to post here some of my conversations with her as my gratitude.

Dear Clara:

I am so glad you liked the card.

You are the divine so when you thank your Self for life, are you thankful that you have the opportunity to live and love? 

Are you thankful that by some miracle you have created all of this and now enjoy them? 

Are you in awe of the totality that is you and also me and the birds and the tigers?

 Is it this miracle that humbles you into gratitude? 

Are you thankful for the perception of duality as well or is that a misunderstanding one can do without?

 It is still a miracle, the duality I mean.

Have I it right or am I just imagining your state of being falsely?

I certainly am grateful that you are here and I can talk to you.

Love,

Sunil

Dear Sunil:

All of the above. Gratitude to the Divine, even if I am That, the relative, illusory individual relates to the whole through understanding, and realizes it as the very nature-essence of their being and consciousness. Manifestation is the play and display of the divine absolute. So all is It, all is That. Gratitude is devotion, bhakti. When is accompanied by understanding, realization, then is parabhakti.

Much Love!

Sunil: The questions posed by the impostor mind now, is why? Why bother wake up? Why not live with the pleasure and pain, greed and fear of this dream and eventually kick the bucket to do it over again, if one believes in reincarnation. I can see why it is the ultimate pain that may drive one to seek the truth, it is very hard to motivate oneself to give up the mirage while things are going okay. I can see why so many of us in the west give out charities to make us feel less guilty and find temporary relief. How can I find that true inspiration which allows me to follow the Buddha's path, reject the material pleasure for seeking truth? Indeed he was a great one. I fear of a calamity which is the only way for me to see that the world I see is so trivial compared the world that is.

Love, 

Sunil

Dear Sunil

Forgive please the delay. 

I have no answer. There's no why. I see it all as organic: it's the whole who/what runs it all. At some point it's seen what matters and what not, but this does not imply the world is rejected or renounced literally, or in practical life, only the dependence on it it's weakened or diminished. Divine consciousness takes over. Do not fear anything, all is taken care: you are taken care. Enjoy the world until the Divine claims your heart. It has already happened anyway.

Love

Clara